2013: Year in Review

I honestly don’t remember a whole lot from 2013, especially the first half.  To be honest, looking back, 2013 was just ok overall.  Majority of the year was stressful workwise, especially until September.

January

I don’t remember much except that I was supposed to run Disney and I couldn’t.  3 month running hiatus due to adrenal issues.

Hosted godson’s baby shower.  Sorority chapter at Texas State activated.  Poured myself into yoga.

I do remember legislative session was in full swing.  I was working A LOT.

February

More legislative session, not running, and tired.

Our secretary at work died 😦

8 year anniversary with Dan.

My godson was born!!!

Had surgery at the end of February.

Got a stand up desk (YAY!)

March

More legislative session.  Stress.  Recovering from surgery.  SXSW.

Couldn’t defend my Thin Mint Sprint title 😦  Volunteered instead.

I started run-walking at the end of March.  It SUCKED.  I couldn’t control my breathing.

April

More legislative session.  Stress.  No rain.  More work stress.

San Francisco for LUNA Summit with all but 1 of my teammates.  Great time!  Started run-walking more.

May

More legislative session.  Stress.  No rain.  More work stress.  Traveled a little for work.  Dan’s parents came for a visit.

June

Legislative session over!  Still no rain.

Changed doctors.

I became a Godmother.

Jalapeno Half in Fort Worth.  The only summer race I’ve ever done, may be my last!  Great weekend with mom and sister.

Turning point with work role.  New assignment.  Still no rain.

July

Working my old duties AND new duties at work.  Still no rain.  In fact, it got worse.

Work trip with visits with some of favorites.

Vacation booked to Hawaii.

Stopped doing yoga much at all.

Finally got some overdue appreciation during a big work event.

Had a big weight gain out of no where (big for a short amt of time and my frame).  I didn’t change my food or exercise.  Frustrated.

August

This was the turning point of the year.

Went to see Jason Boland and Pat Green in New Braunfels and had a wonderful time with a bunch of old friends.  It was very reminiscent of the old days.

I separated from Dan.  Hardest thing i’ve ever had to say/do.  He agreed it was right.

Hawaiian vacation cancelled.

September 

September was the longest month of my life.  Trying to get the last 8.5 years of my life sorted out.

I decided to live in our house until October.  After October 1, we would go our separate ways.   Except my way was me leaving my house.  My home.  Moved in with my sister.  He kept our house.

I only told my family and closest friends about the split.  That’s what he and I agreed to.

Spent a week in Houston to “find myself.”  Friends, family, sports, food.  To sum it up, it was a “game changer.”

Dove into my new work role 100% and made the decision to stop letting others dump on me.

October 

Started over.  No home.  No money.

Overwhelming support from my family, friends, and coworkers.

Traveled a lot.  2 work trips and a trip to San Francisco for the Nike Women’s half.  Great memories made.  Love SF.

Started getting back to many things I used to do pre-Dan.  Things I put aside because he didn’t like them or I no longer had time.

Once word started to get out that I was single, it spread like wildfire.  All of a sudden I had texts and messages from people who wanted to date me.  This was very foreign and unexpected.  Actually, uncomfortable.

November 

A little more work travel.

Not feeling great running.  No energy.  Not having an easy time lugging extra weight either.  Shiner Half was perfect weather for me, but the race for me was anything but.

I started missing my old house.  My stuff.  Being hostess for Thanksgiving.

Got my first Christmas job.  It was a great idea.  Not much money, but good people and warm hearts.

December

By far the best month of the year to me.  Despite missing my old house again.  My fireplace.  My Christmas tree.

I had another great month at work.  Got a raise.  Got lots of kudos.

I learned patience. Or the closest I will ever get to it.

I learned the true meaning of love.  Watching my godson open his Christmas gift.  Spending a weekend in yoga pants and an over-sized sweatshirt.  Carefully selected groceries.  Listening to others.

Cut back the running to almost nothing.

Waiting on salivary cortisol test to come in.  Fingers crossed my adrenals are fine.

~~I am almost 20 lbs heavier than I started the year.  I don’t have my own place.  Another whole year of frustrating visits to the doctors with no answers.

Even with those things hanging over my head, this year was ok.  I know 2014 is going to be a big year for me.  Big for my career, big for my health, and big for my relationships.   I will love more and work less.  This year I will NOT let vacation time roll!!!

I am going to make a new home for myself.  Spend more time with my godson.  Spend more time with family and friends.  Spend more time on me.

Powers of healing

Minus Tuesday, which was a super high stress day at work, I have been feeling GREAT!  Like I stayed out until 3 am on Saturday morning and I didn’t take a nap Saturday OR Sunday (although for my adrenals, that a nap probably would have been wise).  And I have actually slept at night!  Granted, I am still waking up at least twice, but once of those is by alarm to take my early morning dose of thyroid.

What have I been doing other than the new supplements, along with my regular medication?

Yoga.  I did Yoga, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday.  My favorite of course is the class at Lululemon.  I wish they were having them there in February.  I did a small amount of Galloway before yoga on Sunday and it felt fine.  But my issue wasn’t always how I felt, it was what my body reacted to on the inside.  I haven’t done it again since.  Maybe today.

Giving.  I took half a day off on Friday, so I could volunteer for the Rogue 10k/30K packet pick-up.  I may have played hookie 🙂  I got to hang out with my gal Jenn and meet some new people.

Fun.  Dinner at Garrido’s with Dan and our friend Heather on Friday night.

Is it just me, or does Dan’s steak, over potato cakes with giant roasted jalapeno on top look kind of naughty?  Yeah, 90% of their menu is GF, I think he ordered that to keep me paws off of it (the potato cakes aren’t GF).

DanGarridos

I got steak too, sorta.  We didn’t eat dinner until late, so this was actually a 2nd light dinner for me.  There was no way I could wait until 8:30 to eat!mkGarridos

 Drive By Truckers show at the new Emo’s east after dinner.  If it weren’t for drunk college kids, it would have been the perfect evening.  Music heals.  This girl doesn’t do front row for ANYONE anymore.  But no matter what I say or how crazy the crowd is, I ALWAYS end up in the front row for DBT!

That’s my trying to be artistic pic of my Alabama guy, watching our favorite band from Alabama!
dan dbt

We didn’t get home until 3 am.  WHEW!  Long Friday was SO worth it.  Exactly what we needed.

Saturday and Sunday, I worked on a few projects that were long overdue and did my taxes.  Now I am waiting for Dan to do his, to decide who claims the house (depends who benefits more $ from it).

Besides some stress hiccups from work, I am feeling GOOD!  Praying this lasts!

Bigger granny pill box

I’ve been so busy lately with work and last weekend’s trip to San Antonio and San Marcos, I haven’t had much time for anything.  I’ve been trying to get extra sleep like I was told, but that certainly didn’t happen this weekend and it’s been hard this week.  I already feel like I only work and sleep with 7-8 hours a night!  I am supposed to be working on 8-10 hours a night.  This is especially hard when I wake up 3-4 times a night.

Went to the Dr. today.  Saw the nurse practitioner, which was good, because it’s the one I actually like 🙂  I’d originally become upset when I found out I couldn’t see the Dr, but this lady I like, so we were good.  She’s a pretty smart cookie, so I don’t mind seeing her.  The other nurse, I do not like AT ALL.

I’ve known for almost a month now that I have adrenal fatigue.  I cut all working out except walking and yoga at the beginning of the month.  I’d just been waiting to talk to someone specifically about the results.

Today she expanded on my test results and what they mean.  Yes, I have adrenal fatigue.  My seratonin, GABA, and epinephrine are all low.  My DHEA is low even though I take DHEA.  I was told this is because my body is likely robbing DHEA because of cortisol issues.

My histamines are high.  From my report: Histamine value is on a high end especially with Vitamin C on board. Vitamin C blocks histamine excretion from mast cells. GI distress is most likely playing a role in your histamine level and the very low synthesis of serotonin since most of it is manufactured in the GI tract.

Everything she said made sense.  My body isn’t using and/or producing hormones like it should.  So I have to fix that.  I have to supplement what my body isn’t converting, not with more hormones (although I have some that I am already on), but with more supplements.photo

I now have a load of pills I have to take everyday.  I told her I wanted to get off of stuff and not be on pills forever (well except thyroid, that’s pretty much forever).  She said 6 months on the supplements and when those hopefully balance my other hormones, we can start backing off of most everything.  Gosh I hope so!  I need a bigger granny pillbox and a schedule, because now I have way too many pills and times to take things.  I went from everything in AM and 1 thing at night, to more stuff in AM, 1 at lunch, and more night stuff.  SHEESH!  I HATE HATE HATE medication and I never take anything unless I have to, so all of these pills are making me nuts.

Activity.  Well I got a pat on the back for walking and yoga (and for sticking to it).  She told me I could do really tiny Galloway stints.  I think I am going to stick to walking and yoga for at least another week, to give my body more rest.  I want to run, but I want to be better more.

Hoping I start healing and feeling better.  I feel ok, but I so very much want to feel and look like the old me!

Where I stand

I haven’t really updated on the medical issues, because there really isn’t much to say.   (and I was superstitious, thinking if I talked about it, it would jinx progress in figuring things out).

I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s two weeks ago.  It’s an auto-immune disease.  An answer, right?  Wrong.  My levels are not treatable.  They say eventually it will be a problem, but right now my levels aren’t off enough to treat.  Because of this, they don’t think this is causing all of my problems.  Although my problems are pretty text-book for the disease.  They said since my levels aren’t really off, there must be another cause.

Had another round of blood work done last week, this time for adrenal issues.  That too came back off.  Endocrinologist wanted me to do an overnight test.

Yesterday I had a followup with my regular Dr, who doesn’t really think it’s the adrenal thing, but since I was going to the lab anyhow this morning, he ordered a battery of different tests.  7 vials worth.

So here I sit again, wondering if any of these tests will show anything.  I’m hoping that one day soon, I get some answers.

So that’s the medical side. 

Physically and emotionally I have been a wreck for the last two weeks.  The last decent run I had was exactly 2 weeks ago.  I’ve struggled with all runs, even the short ones.  The best way i’d describe it is that my body is tired and feels like it’s always recovering from a hard workout.  After runs, I feel fine.  The before and during hasn’t been good lately.

There is more to life than working out, but those other parts of my life are hard too.  I couldn’t stand at a concert last week.  I’m still not sleeping well at night.  When I wake up, it takes me about an hour to shake the stiffness in my legs.   Some days I have reactions to food I eat.  And I get upset and frustrated about the situation a lot.  God Bless Dan.  He’s seen me cry way too much lately.

I do not feel like myself.  Most days lately I feel like i’m twice my age at least.

I’m not giving up hope.  Just hoping some answers are near.