Rollercoaster

I’ve had more good days lately, which is a good thing 🙂  Went from hardly any good days to about half of the week.  Some improvement noted.

Thursday however, not good. For the first time ever, I bought an article of clothing at the gym.   Wore it out Thursday evening.There I was wearing this little Gold’s shirt that had a cute fitness statement on it, with my stomach distended so far, I couldn’t see my toes.  I felt like a moron.

I don’t want to go to the pool, or river, or any place where I cannot wear a moo-moo this weekend 😦

I miss my body and I’d like it back.  It’s one thing to feel weird, but when you look it too, that’s even harder.

I know I need to be patient and take this one week at a time.  You’d think by now that i’d be used to it, but this whole thing is still incredibly upsetting to me.  And every so often, I have a total pity party about it, like today.

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